A play within a play within a novel

The following is something I am toying with as a “play within a play” in my novel 🙂

Ezio, a spoiled count, is hated by his people for being a war-mongering ruler. However, when he sees how his thirst for power has led a solder named Caleb to become wounded, Ezio is overcome with grief. Seeing this, Lord Dyne, Ezio’s adviser, encourages a friendship between the two men, and they become very close. Ezio begins to be loved by the people, but when Mina, a lady of the court, catches Caleb’s eye. Ezio decrees no man may marry a woman of a higher station, unless he permits it. Dyne convinces Caleb to stay with Ezio, offering to promote him to a lord if he can stay with Ezio for a fortnight. Caleb returns to Ezio, and Ezio believes Caleb will be his forever.

During the fortnight, Dyne tells Mina that if she wants Ezio to leave Caleb alone, she must be cruel to him in public. He promises to deliver a letter from her telling Caleb explaining all of this. The following day, Mina declares that she and Dyne are engaged, and goes on and on about how important Dyne’s rank and wealth are to her. Caleb falls into a deep depression. To cheer him up, Ezio decides to throw a huge masked ball. When Mina learns of the ball, she searches her house for the invitation, and finds the letter Dyne was to have delivered to Caleb. Realizing Dyne intends to actually marry her, she decides to go to the ball in disguise, and explain all of this to Caleb. Meanwhile Ezio thinks Caleb’s costume is better looking than his, and demands they switch.

Thoughts?

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4 Comments

  1. Melanie said,

    March 16, 2011 at 11:51 am

    I’ve always been a fan of either masquerade balls or disguises in general.

  2. Anne said,

    March 16, 2011 at 12:35 pm

    Richard,

    It is very good, even without knowing the full plot. However, in reading it, it reminded more of an opera than a play. It has all the hallmarks- disguises, possible tragedy, a love triangle. It can end either tragically or not, though with what I have read, I lean on the side of tragedy. So, I think it is great. Just make it an opera instead of a play.

    love,
    Anne

  3. Melanie said,

    March 16, 2011 at 9:25 pm

    i love Anne’s idea!!

  4. Tanglethis said,

    March 18, 2011 at 8:32 pm

    Sounds a little like Phantom of the Opera and a little like the Mikado. ; ) So, opera it is!


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